My life has drastically improved since my dear friend, Landru, introduced me to this genius of a site. Now I can reflect on what it means to have a dog like Walter who sometimes takes dumps on Rumsfield's yard. Oh, and I have a place where I can openly admit to being a Corey Feldman fan without the backlash of my friends who don't even remember who he is. I was totally born ten years too late.
Greetings and Salutations
You can take a dump on my lawn any day! I'll call the pizza dude, it will be far out!
I will remember that. Your yard does look like it needs a little fertilization.
The sign is up in my yard just today. It's officially for sale...I will $h!t my pants if someone named Klopek buys it...
Landru, what is that? Slavic?
Damn, worrying about that causes this thing with my stomach again.
Damn, worrying about that causes this thing with my stomach again.
Walter, I have your dog.
NO!
Landru I wish I had been up at the crack of dawn with you to watch a dog poop in your newly for-sale house.
Welcome to the neighborhood, QueeniesHopeDiamond! Here's a little somthin' for the ol' sweet tooth. (Dirt & leaf free.)
Bonnie's making the best brownies on the block.
Walter, I have your dog.
Don't spill those brownies in a hole through the porch
Gimme a brownie Landru.
I'm more of a pretzel and sardine guy myself. 
I'm only laying here with my eyes closed trying to get some goddamn sleep!